Idk why I’m even posting this I’m not even sober yet but I’m gradually working on it, I just don’t feel good enough for anyone or like I can’t do anything right, my family and the school system is just making me feel work about everything and making it harder for me to do better for my self I’m almost an adult and my family is trying to make a plan for my future without any of my input and it’s just stupid yk? It js makes me feel like I’m going insane and knowone listens to me and when I say family I mean mostly my grandma an kinda my mom but i don’t live with her so its not that bad but my grandma just makes me out like im some devil child, like I’ve just been struggling in school but I’m literally on track to graduate and have most my credits and could possibly graduate early if I want an she was like trying to convince me to just drop out (my grandma) and she’s blaming everything on my boyfriend who I’ve been with since September of 2025 and it’s February 2026 now and he’s the only person that been actually trying to help me and who shows he cares about me and has been trying to help me stop smoking weed gradually like I know I can quit smoking I just don’t wanna at this moment I wanna show down but I don’t think I can mentally handle fully stoping right now and he’s understanding of this he used to have his own drug problem and is also working on it and has been doing really good and is trying to help my find a therapist and stuff because I’ve been wanting to hurt myself a lot recently and everything in my life is just falling apart it seems life I just can’t handle it anymore I’ve been through way worse but l js am at a breaking point