Not really about my addiction but I guess now that that’s not taking over my whole life loads of shit is coming up to the surface like the fact that I hate my self and I’ll never be good enough for my self no matter how much I try, that I’m always gonna feel like I’m not pretty enough that I’m not smart enough that I don’t do enough things that I’m just mediocre and a failure, every single attempt I’ve ever made at finding love has been an absolute shit show, a reminder that I am truly unlovable like I don’t even love my self, my parents showed me shitty and conditional love they never just loved me for me, hell nobody in my family truly ever has or at least showed it to me so what in the hell makes me think that a random stranger will?? It’s giving delusional I need to give it a rest, I truly do.